Thirty-six doctors and researchers were summoned to inquisition last week by the World Health Organization Diocese to answer charges of heresy against the Vaccine Church.
The names of the infidels have been engraved in the Holy Muckrakers Registry of Aspersion, to alert faithful Church followers to the danger of cerebral contamination from their blasphemous views.
The accused include a number of well-known physicians and researchers, including:
Dr. Sherri Tenpenny, an osteopathic medical doctor, charged with using the Internet to cast aspersions on Church doctrine.
Retired neurosurgeon Dr. Russell Blaylock, charged with impugning CDC Scripture.
Dr. Gary Null, charged with the production of blasphemous films, and refusing penance.
Biochemist Dr. Boyd Haley, charged with engaging in satanic rituals designed to unlawfully cleanse Holy Heavy Metals.
Celebrated psychiatrist Dr. Duncan Druggem urged the Ecclesiastical Court to order an immediate psychiatric evaluation of the accused, preferably at his convenient Beverly Hills basilica…