Category Archives: Humor

CDC Cautions Against Taking The Red Pill | The Babylon Bee

ATLANTA, GA—The CDC has cautioned Americans against taking the red pill, as it can lead to severe side effects such as “realizing the truth about the way our society is manipulated by the elites” and “spending all your time on YouTube watching Jordan Peterson videos.”

According to the CDC, many are overdosing on red pills, which are a black market drug that has never been approved by the American government…

“And we just have to remind everyone that the CDC is not approved by the FDA or any other governing body. It could spread ideas like that freedom is a good thing and that thinking for yourself is a healthy American value. People might start getting the wrong idea.”…

Meanwhile, the FDA is rushing out an emergency approval process on a new, stronger blue pill to counteract the red pill crisis.

Read the entire spoof at https://babylonbee.com/news/cdc-cautions-against-taking-the-red-pill

Sirens Blaring at Democratic Headquarters as Black Woman [Nicki Minaj] Expresses Unapproved Opinion | The Babylon Bee

…”This kind of independent thought cannot go unchecked,” Nancy Pelosi said in an emergency meeting of Democratic leaders. “This woman of color is saying something she believes that we have not approved — we need to get her back safely within the boundaries we have set for black people to think within.”

“How are we going to stop her?” screamed one frantic aide. “This is destroying our entire narrative!”

“Quick — let’s release a new variant!” Dr. Fauci responded. “I’ll get one rolling immediately.”

At publishing time, Democrats had announced their plan to strip Nicki Minaj of her “brave woman of color” status and treat her as they would a cishet white male…

Read the entire parody at https://babylonbee.com/news/democrats-on-high-alert-as-black-woman-thinks-for-herself